Dhriti Upekkha Ananda
Seventeen years ago, I began a journey that changed my life forever in the best way possible. I had met Jnanda through a group of mutual friends and blew him off for six months before agreeing to work with him. I was married to my second husband, now was-band, and we were raising each other’s children and doing a horrible job of it. We were both alcoholics and I had many other negative behaviors, no other forms of drugs though. I had a bad case of clairvoyance that was uncontrollable and made me feel like I was going insane. Which I may have been at the time. It surely felt like it. I could see that my son was slipping away from me and that I had to do something to fix my life. Fixing my life was a foreign concept to me because I could identify many of the things that were wrong, but I had zero knowledge of what right was, and that deeply bothered me.
As time progressed, I kept calling my best friend and complaining about my life, my was-band, etc. She kept telling me to call Jnanda and start working with him. This finally sank in, and I made an appointment with him. I missed the first appointment and felt really guilty about it, so I made a second appointment and was determined to keep it. This Reiki session was the first session that had any effect on my life. It was the first time someone was able to quiet the multiple voices in my head that I had no control over and could answer my questions. I had so many questions that everyone else just said, “God works in mysterious ways.” I looked at Jnanda when the session was coming to an end and realized that he was the person I had been looking for since I was a little girl. I told him this and he chuckled in his Loving way. I knew then and there that I would never stop healing, never stop doing what I had to do, no matter how hard it may seem. I have finally found peace for the first time in my life. Jnanda taught me how to do this for myself, how to be of true service to myself first by applying the tools necessary to change the bad behaviors and undo the damage of my terrifying childhood. He taught me that I can be of service to those who are open to receive and still Love those who are not without any judgment.
Early on, I was always asking for explanations, and he would tell me that application brings about understanding. (I always wanted to know the end result without putting in any effort due to my lack of trust in the world). He said this to me so many times that I wanted to punch him in the face. Each time, I would do the practices and discover that his words were right and return with Humility and a willingness to progress.
This ashram is a dream come true for me. From a young age, I knew that I was here to help, to overcome, and be of service and that is what the ashram is for me. HYA is the vehicle of change, cooperation, Love, real community, and healing for those who are open to receive. We are all on a path. HYA offers one way to find our true selves and become of true service through doing our first works and selfless servitude of, by, and for the Divine. AUM.